The Weekly Post: The TMI Editon

February 14, 2016
If you don’t want to hear about endometriosis, periods, diarrhoea and vomiting chocolate, don’t read this!

First Happy Valentine’s Day! if you’re into that sort of thing, then I hope it’s the kind of day you want, but a lot of you do.
Second this is going to a little bit different of a weekly post, I’ve given it a warning at the top stating why you might not want to read it, to be kind. But normally I wouldn’t write about this week or I would gloss over how bad it’s been but I’m not one to mince words and quite honestly I’m sick of not talking about how I really am and feel.
This week has sucked balls. I knew it would because my period was due and as I’ve stated before one of my ovaries is stuck to my intestines and this basically means my ovary irritates my intestines and I have super awful diarrhoea and vomiting episodes and honestly I dread the pain. The pain is excruciating, sometimes it’s the pain that makes me vomit.
I woke up on Tuesday at 2:45am with killer intestinal pains and 30 minutes later diarrhoea had kicked in. The pain was excruciating, like it always is but this time it felt so much worse because I was going every 5 minutes when normally there’s a gap or a break, if you will, and I can breathe and wrap my sleep fogged head around the fact that I have to deal with this when there’s a ‘break’ but not this time. It was just bam, bam, bam, oh shit I’m going to vomit and bam, bam, bam. For 45 minutes, it was awful. But I was happy, that it was over fast.
Even though I vomited chocolate, which is another thing to add to my, I don’t like to vomit list which also contains rice, noodles and tuna.
By 6:40 I was back in bed ready to get more than 3.5 hours sleep. You see once the ‘main’ part has past it slows down and takes a while to tapper off. I woke back up before midday and managed to spend what was left of the day with my husband on his day off with my period having now ever so kindly kicked in.
Wednesday was in some sense even worse because even though I only ate soup the day before my intestines are so irritated and unhappy I’m pooping blood. Which has become my new normal! 
Don’t panic, this was one of the reasons I was in A&E in November and so long as it’s not frequent and not a large amount it’s ‘normal’ or to be expected because of my endometriosis. 
By 2pm my period pain has really kicked in and I seriously want to dig my left ovary out with a spoon. 
By 3:30 I can’t stand the pain any longer and dig out my painkillers (not my ovary, because that would be crazy and I’m not there yet!) and take half of one and run a bath to try and deal with the cramps and the fact that my bum is seriously fucking sore. 
By about 4:15 I am absolutely fucked, I try really had not to take my stronger painkillers because they make me loopy. My husband rings me on his way home from work and mocks me because he says I’m high. I get super upset on the phone because today makes six years without my Dad in my life, since he lost his battle with cancer and while I want to grieve and cry and deal with the guilt I feel, I’m in too much pain which makes me feel even worse. Ryan decides to distract me and I decide I have to divorce him because he can’t remember who the author or Pride and Prejudice is! and I’m outraged because a) it’s one of my all time favourite books and b) he’d bought me a copy before and c) my Mum just bought the entire Jane Austen set for my birthday which was just last week!
He eventually talks me down and changes the subject and I can’t remember much of the evening because I continued to stay drugged up because THE PAIN WAS REALLY BAD!
Friday things are still downhill. I want to Google if you can live without your intestines and if you can remove them at home. I don’t. I spend most of the day in bed, curled up in the fetal position because I have the worst trapped gas in a long, long time and oh my god it hurts! I can’t get comfy, I was determined not to take any painkillers today but by 2pm I can’t take it any more and I take one and all it does is make me dizzy. I manage to do some work for a client then force myself to nap while I play The Mummy in the background. 
At 5:30 my intestines decided that I haven’t had enough pain and I’m just sat on the toilet for ages hoping for the gas to come out and the pain to just fucking stop. It doesn’t.
By 7pm I’ve had a bit of diarrhoea again, at least there was no blood. I find the weirdest things to stay positive about. I manage to go downstairs and say hello to my husband, he forces me to eat something now I seem to have less pain.
Saturday is back to diarrhoea land again. But now my period has gone missing! Why does it do this? I have zero clue, but all I can speculate is that my intestines have overridden my ovary and my period should be back tomorrow. That’s usually how it works. I spend two hours on the toilet and then desperately need to go back to bed because I’m exhausted from the pain and diarrhoea.
I manage to put Chicken Run on via Netfilx and collapse in bed in a big shivery mess and sleep until 1pm when my body tells me it’s diarrhoea time again and then I freak out because the stupid toilet won’t flush!
I ring my husband who very patiently tells me how to fix it. While I can tell he’s annoyed, not at me but the toilet, because it does this a lot. 
By 2:30 I’m super cold and I’m refusing to put the heating on because a) I’m in bed and b) being ill in the bathroom with the heating on is just awful. I make a hot water bottle and make myself a cup of hot water because I haven’t drunk, eaten or taken anything all day as there’s still the chance I could throw up. I find Bed Knobs and Broomsticks on Netfilx to watch and make some tweaks to my blog and write this blog post.
By 4:30pm my diarrhoea seems to have slowed down, finally and my husband has finished work and rings to see how I am. We agree I’m back on soup for tea and he pops to the supermarket to get me some tomato soup and Evie some veggies.
The rest of the evening is pretty low key, we curl up on the sofa, I finish re-reading a book and Ryan watches Eureka. 
Today’s plans are few and far between. My husband is off and we don’t really celebrate Valentine’s Day but we still have to get our film date night in and it’s my pick this week and I’ve picked Pixels!
Hope you had a great week! xo

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